Government by Mike Myers At the beginning of the original Austin Powers movie, Dr. Evil (who has been cryogenically frozen since the 1960s) returns to run his evil empire in the 90s. He proposes several hare-brained schemes to extend the reach of his Evil Empire; for example, threatening to create a hole in the ozone layer with a lazer. When the doctor is told that his nightmare scenarios have already come to pass, he becomes flustered, and shouts, " I'm the leader! I need the info! Throw me a frickin' bone here!" I would assume that President Bush is throwing the same sort of temper tantrum right now. At the very least, he exhibits the same lost-in-time bewilderment and incompetence. Welcome to the era of slapstick government. "Last year, David Kay had confidently predicted weapons would be found. But after nine months of searching, he said Sunday: 'I don't think they exist.'" David Kay, as you may recall, headed the U.S. WMD inspection campaign following the departure of the much-derided U.N. team, headed by Hans Blix. David Kay is a fellow at the conservative Patomac Institute--a Washington think tank composed of former military officers. Bush thought that his hand-picked man would deliver the desired results. What does it say about Bush's WMD claims when his own weapons inspection team contradicts him? President Bush's administration has about as much credibility as a Jessica Simpson concept album. Even Colin Powell, ever the dutiful soldier, conceded today that he had no fricking idea what he was talking about in the speech he gave to the U.N. on the day before the war began. Yesterday in Europe, this is what he had to say.. "The open question is how many stocks they had, if any. And if they had any, where did they go? And if they didn't have any, then why wasn't that known beforehand?" Aren't you the same guy who made such a compelling case for waging the war, Colin? The best that could be said about the most credible person in the administration is that he's a bungling doofus who can't keep the story straight. If you're going to lie, Colin, at least lie consistently. Be warned, David and Colin. In the words of Dr. Evil, "this organization will not tolerate failure". Don't you remember what happened to Will Farrell's Mustapha character? Attribution Attribution:AP