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Wednesday, March 03, 2004

Unfrozen Caveman President

Ever since the first Bush/Gore debate, I've felt an eerie sense of deja vu whenever I've gazed upon the visage of our beady-eyed president with his prominent forehead and square jaw.

Yesterday, while watching an old Saturday Night Live rerun, I realized where I'd seen him before:

The late Phil Hartman's "Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer" sketch. Am I crazy? You be the judge!

As I recall, Bush said the following in his State of the Union address:

"My fellow Americans... I'm just a caveman."

"I fell on some ice and later got thawed out by some of your scientists."

"Your world frightens and confuses me! Sometimes the odd noises from these metal boxes scares me and makes me want to run back to my cave. Sometimes when I look up at the ceiling I see these strange tubes that light up at the flick of a wall stick, I wonder, did demons catch light from the sun and put it there? I don't know! My primitive mind can't grasp these concepts. I don't understand your "buget deficits", but there's one thing I do know...The rich deserve more tax cuts."

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